Make Them Defend
“If you defend, you can be defeated.” You make the attacker defend. You make what you fear defend. You make your fear inside defend. We never defend ourselves for who we are.
By Jon Ochiai
March 8, 2025
In Aikido, when the attacker punched to Hanshi’s face, he moved in striking to the attacker’s face with his left hand. The attacker stopped, so not to get hit in the face. Hanshi moved in with his right hand to the attacker’s head in iriminage. He moved his hips and finished in profile. The attacker took the fall instead of getting hit in the face, again. They choose.
Hanshi had said, “If you defend, you can be defeated.”
When someone attacks me, I don’t block the attack. I don’t defend against the attack. I match the attack in my attack. I make the attacker defend. I make what I fear defend. You make what you fear defend, too.
In Sunday Aikido practice, we trained with the jo (wooden staff). The semei (attacker) struck to my center. I moved to the side, away from center of the attack, and tried to counter.
Ishibashi Sensei said, “When you move to the side you’re running away. Stay under the attack.”
Sensei shows me what to do. I wait out the attack, until the attacker’s jo nearly touches me. Even if it touches, I have time. I take a glancing blow, if I have to. I’m not always going to get away scot-free.
I hold my jo under the attack. When I’m in the distance, I come from under the attacker’s jo over the top of theirs. I move my jo in a spiral. I come over the top and touch the attacker’s center with my jo. I make the attacker move back. I give them a choice. I don’t strike to hurt.
When I hit the attacker hard, Sensei said that I don’t strike in anger. This is practice. Even if that was a real attack, there is no fight. I’m in the danger, in the center of the attack. I strike with my feeling out. I strike from my one point, ki. I make the attacker defend. Make them move back. I don’t strike with anger, out of fear. I let go my fear inside. I’m quiet inside. My feeling out. My feeling is forward. I move forward. That’s the purpose of the training.
I face all kinds of attacks in life. Fortunately, they are not predominantly punches or with a sword. Still, attacks can be physical, verbal, or emotional. When someone attacks me for whatever reason, I don’t defend. I don’t defend myself for who I am. I hold my position. Stand my ground. I make whoever attacks, defend. They choose whether to continue their attack or stand down. We both choose. There is no fight.
I have nothing to do with what goes on inside someone else, inside someone who attacks me. I have a say in what goes on inside me.
O-Sensei Morihei Ueshiba said, “True victory is victory over oneself.” There is no fight. It’s only me against me. I’m my greatest opponent. Always.
It doesn’t matter whether the attacker is bigger, stronger, faster, smarter, or better than me. I hold my position, in the danger, under the attack. I let go my fear inside that I’m not good enough. My feeling out. My feeling is forward. I keep moving forward. I could win. I could lose. That’s life. I’m the greatest that I can be in the moment. I can always live with that.
A few years ago, I had my Match dotcom date with Jacqui. We met at the movie theater for our date. When she looked at me, she expected that I would be taller. I said that I was 5’3” in my Match profile. That still hurt. I took that glancing blow. I didn’t defend being short. My feeling was out. I moved forward.
Jacqui was kind and a good sport in continuing our date. We saw Wonder Woman and had a nice dinner together. I never saw her again. I was not what she was looking for.
Like Hanshi said, “If you defend, you can be defeated.” You make the attacker defend. You make what you fear defend. You make your fear inside defend. We never defend ourselves for who we are.
I work on being the greatest that I can be. When that’s not good enough for others, I let it go. I love myself for who I am and forgive myself for who I’m not. My feeling out. I keep my feeling forward. Move forward. I live my life.
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